Losing a Pet Is Heartbreaking: I’m Heartbroken

Dogs are not our

Twelve years ago, we met our best friend, Buddy. My husband and I drove to the house where he’d lived the first four months of his life. We were standing in the garage, and Buddy came galloping out, like he was saying, “Hi! I’m Buddy, and I’m fun!”

It was love at first sight.

Half an hour later, we were in the car with our high-spirited puppy, his crate, bowls, and toys.

On the way home, my husband drove and I sat in the back with the new addition to our family. He seemed nervous and snuggled right up to me, so close. It was like he knew I’d keep him safe. Our bond was instant.

I pet his head and said, “You’re such a good boy, Buddy. Don’t worry, everything will be okay. I love you.”

Buddy was the perfect dog for our family. His energy and playfulness filled our home with laughter. He was there in the good times, and there to cuddle and console when times were hard.

He was our protector, our walking partner, and our silent listener. He was never angry with us. He was sweet and demanding, stubborn and smart. All he ever gave was pure, unconditional love.

Our daughters, Mackenzie and Talee, were so close to Buddy, they referred to him as their little brother.

Peace from Panic

This past weekend our best friend and constant companion became very ill.

I’m grateful that Mackenzie and Talee both happened to be home. The girls gave Buddy lots of love and attention, like always. They played with him in the pool and took pictures. They saw Buddy’s decline.

We had to do what we’d been dreading for nearly 13 years. We had to say goodbye.

On the way to the vet’s office, I drove and my husband sat in the back with our faithful dog. Buddy snuggled close to my husband, and was calm. It was like he knew.

My husband pet Buddy’s head and said, “You’re such a good boy, Buddy. Don’t worry, everything will be okay. I love you.”

Full circle.

That afternoon, my husband, daughter, and I didn’t want to be in the quiet house. We  went out to do some errands. On the drive home, we took the “back way,” a beautiful, serene road with sprawling ranches on either side. We’ve gone this way hundreds of times.

There was something in the middle of the road. We looked closer and it was a gorgeous, majestic deer. We have never, ever seen a deer on that road. We slowed down and watched this amazing animal prance across the road and gracefully jump to the other side.

We all thought the same thing. It was a sign from Buddy, letting us know he’s okay. He’s happy and healthy again. We shouldn’t worry.

Our home feels so empty.

Every single room has reminders of our little guy. One minute I’ll be fine, and the next I’m tearing up and sobbing. It’s the small things that I want back. He followed me everywhere. The kitchen, the office, the family room, the bathroom.

When Buddy was sleeping and I’d walk into the room, I’d hear his tail thump, wagging because he was glad to see me. He loved walks and was super food-motivated. It made us laugh when he’d hop up on a lounge chair in our backyard, and bask in the sun.

One of his favorite things to do was spend time outside when I was gardening or if someone went swimming. The day he died, I broke down when I walked out to the backyard.

I told Talee that losing Buddy is too painful, and I don’t think I’ll ever want another dog.

She said, “Mom, you don’t mean that. He gave us so many years of joy, and you wouldn’t trade that for anything.”

No, I wouldn’t.

In time, there will be less tears. We have millions of happy memories. But right now the sadness and emptiness is raw.

I know we gave Buddy a wonderful life. But he enriched ours in ways that he’ll never know.

20 Best Inspirational Dog Death Quotes Pinterest Images

Third image courtesy of here

Fourth image courtesy of here

 

103 thoughts on “Losing a Pet Is Heartbreaking: I’m Heartbroken

  1. I’m sorry for your loss. Losing a faithful companion like Buddy is heartbreaking. As my dog ages, I often think one day that I won’t hear his snoring one day as he cuddles next to me on the couch. It’s painful to experience, but there will be healing and your heart is big enough to take in another faithful companion.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Thank you. That’s another thing that was comforting, hearing Buddy sigh and snore. It’s those little every day things. I agree with you, that in time, I’ll want to share my life with another sweet companion. Thanks for your nice comment💜

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  2. I am so very sorry for your loss!! Your words touched my heart! I still remember the pain of losing our Boston Terrier when she was 12 years old. Of telling her the same thing that it would be OK, even though I wasn’t OK. Its hard, give yourself time to grieve. Buddy left pawprints on your heart that will last forever!! Read Rainbow Bridge, but have tissues nearby!
    You will fall in love again with a furry friend, once your heart is hooked on them, you can’t help it, but for now you don’t have to think of that. (((HUGS)))) to you and your family!!

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  3. I’m sorry for your loss of Buddy. I’m sure he’ll be with you forever, and when you are ready that you experience the joy of another four-legged friend.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. So very sorry for your loss. Poignant. Really got me choked up with the full circle of Everything will be okay. I dread the day(s) as we all do, knowing each loss brings us into that raw place again. Every one of them different, every one of them loved so deeply. Love, sweet love, we do it again and again, because our hearts are made to heal. ❤

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  5. So sorry for the loss of your faithful companion. It is heartbreaking when they leave us. I just tell ours that I’ll see them again, someday. I don’t know your beliefs, but I’m sure they will be waiting to welcome us, when our time comes. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you. That definitely is the hardest part. I’ve dreaded that final goodbye for years. It was awful. And that’s a good way to put it, I do feel like I have a hole in my heart. I appreciate your support, thank you. xx

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  6. I’m so sorry for your loss. Our pets really are family, aren’t they? He was fortunate to have such a loving family, and you were fortunate to have him. I’ve been where you are, and although I can’t know exactly how you feel I know how hard it was for us. You’ll all be in my thoughts and prayers.

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  7. Oh Jenny, I am so tearful now, because I know exactly what you are going through. I am so sorry for your loss. Buddy will always be with you in your heart and soul forever. The loss of our precious ones is so so hard. It is not going to be easy, but know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.xxx

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  8. This is a terrible moment for us to go through, I personally passed this awful moment not so long ago, and it has upset me reading your story, it is so sad, they are so faithful , but if he was ill, he is happy now, and time will help a little also, lots of love ❤

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  9. When we lost our cat back in 2007, I was heartbroken. She was the only cat I’d ever known. (I was 12, she was 17.) We’d had to leave our other cat behind when we moved because of his illness, and he hadn’t lasted long after we gave him to my uncle. But to lose Ginger… when we got home the next day, I sang out, “Kitty! We’re home!” when we opened the door. And all of us stopped. And realized it would never be the same.

    A little more than a year later, we got two more kittens. I had to take Sylvester to the vet this past week. They’re nine years old now, and sometimes I think about the fact that one day, only one of them will wake up. They’ll go crazy looking for their missing sibling. And I cry whenever I think about it.

    I’m so sorry for your loss, and know how painful it is. It may be a long time before you get another dog, and it may be a short while. You’ll know when you’re ready, if you ever are. I wish you nothing but good thoughts and memories.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you for sharing your story, I truly appreciate that. I’m sorry about Ginger. I know what you mean about automatically saying “We’re home!” because what’s been happening to me is when leave the house, I automatically want to say, “Bye Buddy. I’ll be home soon. Be a good boy.” I’ve been saying that for 12 years, hard to stop. Even if I don’t say it out loud, I’m thinking it. And when we come inside the house, I expect him to greet us near the door. Enjoy your cats, that’s so sweet they’re siblings. I know saying goodbye one day is part of pet ownership. But it’s so awful. Thanks for your support and kind words. xx

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  10. Losing a pet is hard. I well remember the memorial services we would hold under the apple tree (where our pets were buried when they passed) and crying our eyes out.
    And yes….it seems you will never want another one…but it is amazing how much you will love the next one also.

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  11. I do not have time to go to my Reader often. Any e-mails telling me someone has posted are usually attended to ASAP. I saw your post as I scrolled through. Oh how from my heart to your heart I related to you at this time. We also had to farewell in the past 12 months the beautiful border collie companion who enriched our lives and in many ways significantly connected to each one in our family more than I can express. Shaggy needed love…we gave him love and what he gave us was 1000 time more in loyalty and comfort. He will never be forgotten. We helped our son who was going overseas by taking in his kelpie Kel. She was a handful. Born to gather sheep she needed lots of running (twice a day). She keep us moving and exercised and filled in a small way the deep ache of loss for our boy but in time we bonded. Sadly she too came to the end of her life unexpectedly due to a genetic illness but had, I have to believe 10 happy years . This time my husband and I were shattered! The house seemed empty. The gold fish even looked ‘droopy.’ It was hard for us (now oldies) to keep walking. Is there perhaps somewhere out there still in our life an animal who may need our love? We are not looking but ? Maybe. My heart-felt response to your blog is……….Some folks never have or never will know the love and the memories you will carry always for your Buddy. Don’t rush no animal will ever replace but perhaps………..one day. For now remember with all the heartfelt love of experiences. This too will pass. Greetings across the miles. Shared tears but a heart fulL of understanding.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Faye, this was so beautiful. Thank you so much for your kind words and for sharing your story. I’m sorry about Shaggy and Kel. Really sad. But you gave them both wonderful lives. The house is empty without our constant companions, isn’t it? I love how you said even the goldfish looked droopy. Things are simply not the same. I appreciate your words of advice about possibly getting a new dog. No rush, and in time, maybe it will happen. Right now I’m cherishing my memories of our sweet Buddy. Thank you for sharing your tears and understanding with me. xx

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  12. Such a beautiful and heart-wrenching post – we have a dog named Buddy too! I think this just shows how we need to appreciate these wonderful creatures and make every moment with them count. And I believe in signs too 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • Aw, you have a Buddy too! 🙂 I agree with you… ever since Buddy was a puppy, I knew the time with him would go much too fast. Every morning when we woke up, I’d tell him I was so happy to see him and give him a bunch of attention. I cherished all the times he was by my side, which was a lot. Give your Buddy a little hug for me! xx

      Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you. And aw, you have a Buddy too 🙂 When our Buddy was a puppy, I remember thinking what will I do without this little guy? It popped in my head at different times during his life, and I swept it away, didn’t want to think about it, didn’t need to think about it yet. But I’d give him some extra love and attention, knowing my time with him wouldn’t last long enough. Take care and enjoy your Buddy!

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  13. Pets are truly a part of the family, and it’s heartbreaking to lose them. We lost our beloved cat in 2012 and there’s still a hole in our hearts and a space on ‘his’ chair. It does get easier over time, although you never stop missing them. A new cat’s started visiting the garden, and his markings are so similar that sometimes out of the corner of my eye, I think it’s him… Much sympathy to all of you x

    Liked by 2 people

    • Aw, that’s sweet about the new cat. Thanks for sharing, I’m sorry about your beloved cat. I’ve realized exactly what you said… it will get easier, but I will always have a hole in my heart, missing Buddy. That will never go away. Thanks again xx

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  14. Sorry about Buddy. We had to say farewell to our dear old Molly (black lab cross, 16 years old, faithful family member) early in January of this year. I still see her sometimes out of the corner of my eye…it takes a long time to get over the loss of a loved one. In fact, I don’t think we ever really do; their loss becomes part of our selves, just as their lives were part of our own. Check out my blog post if you would like to see the story of Molly. Best regards. I am going to start following your blog, it looks interesting, and well written.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you so much for your kind words and for visiting here. I agree with everything you said, you said it perfectly. I catch myself looking for Buddy in certain rooms and sometimes think I hear him, shaking his head so his collar jingles. Those feelings may fade over the years, but they’ll never completely go away. And I don’t want them to. Sorry about your Molly. Wow, such a wonderful, long life. I’m going to head to your blog and read about Molly. Nice to connect with you!

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  15. I know exactly how this feels. But a Buddhist friend once told me, energy is never lost. It is only replaced. You will find him in other things that make you happy. When I lost my dog, I got FOUR more to replace the void and it really helped. Give the love you have to other animals that need it. It is never wasted.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you for this. I love what you said, that energy is never lost, it’s only replaced. That’s comforting to me. And wow, you got four more dogs! Lots of love to go around! Thanks again for your lovely comment. xx

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  16. My condolences. I lost my Skippy this morning. He gave me more comfort than I could ever imagine and defined love for me. I hope to always have him in my heart as that will make me a better person. Thank you for sharing.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Oh no, I’m so sorry about your Skippy. I know how hard it is, how painful it is. He gave you so much comfort, and in return, you gave him comfort and a wonderful life. He will always be in your heart, forever. In time, you’ll think of the fun times and hold those special memories close. Big hugs to you xx

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  17. I’m so sorry for your loss, for you and your family. these are things I wish no one had to go through and our pets could have longer lives because they bring so much warmth into our hearts and homes.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you for your comforting words. And yes, they bring so much warmth and joy into our lives. Often I wish pets lived longer, the time with them goes by much too fast. Thank you again, and for visiting here!

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