Sometimes I forget.
I forget to be mindful, relax and enjoy life, and remember that everything will be fine.
My husband Alex and I have been making some big business and financial decisions lately, and I admit, it’s stressful. It’s a roller coaster — I go from being calm and excited one minute, to anxious and worried the next.
I prefer life to be simple and unchanged. Alex is more of a risk taker (although a very careful and logical one), and he enjoys change. I fully trust him and know I need to step out of my comfort zone more often.
I’m confident it’ll all work out. Change is good and inevitable. There’s a time to remain stagnant and a time to move forward.
Okay, I know all that, but still… I’m nervous.
This past weekend, Alex and I decided to go out for the day in a convertible. We wanted to have a Sunday Fun-day, like we didn’t have a care in the world.
At first I was all uptight about too much sun and wind. I pulled my hair back in a bun, put on my favorite baseball cap, rubbed sun screen all over my face, and put sunglasses on.
Alex backed out of the driveway, turned on the music, and off we went. We headed down a twisty mountain and it felt wonderful to be so close to nature while driving. I’m not used to being in a convertible. Normally our windows are up and it’s like being in a metal box, closed from the outside.
The sides of the mountain were almost near enough to reach out and touch. I noticed how lush and green the hills were from the recent rains. Mustard weed and flowers dotted the landscape with bright color. Two rabbits hopped in the wild grass and I hoped they’d be safe from coyotes.
As we drove past agriculture fields, Alex asked if I could smell the cilantro and onions. I breathed in deep and sniffed in the familiar scents. But something else happened too. I relaxed. It felt like the anxiety and stress were melting away.
I felt free. Or at least, free-er.
That feeling continued when we arrived at the restaurant for lunch. We laughed and chatted and savored a delicious fish meal. It was like we were on vacation. I wanted to bottle that feeling and keep it with me forever.
After walking around town, browsing shops, and licking every drop of an ice cream cone, we knew it was time to head home. I scooped my hair back and plopped the hat on top of my head.
We were half way home when I realized something. Here we are, in a convertible on a gorgeous spring day, blessed to be having a great time together, and I’m not taking full advantage of it. Loosen up, Jenny.
That’s when I yanked off my baseball cap and hair tie and let my hair fly. The wind whipped my hair and I didn’t care one bit if it got messy and tangled. Alex looked at me and smiled, then took off his hat.
I closed my eyes and let the wind take over. I laughed because it was hard to see with hair blowing in my face. The warm sun beat down and getting a sunburn never crossed my mind. I felt totally and completely carefree.
I let go.
I captured the moment in my mind, knowing I’d want to relive it again and again. I wished Alex would drive 100 more miles so that feeling could last longer.
We were back in our driveway much too soon.Second image courtesy of here
Third image courtesy of here
Fourth image courtesy of here